It's not the monumental first that is commemorated by the unveiling or a "you made it through the year of firsts."
It's not the second that is the one past the first and people still remember to check on you.
It's not the mile marker fifth or tenth.
It is just the third. Perhaps the third is the start of "everyone forgets" and "people have moved on"
But we haven't forgotten.
It doesn't affect us every day as it once did but certainly on holidays, on Father's Day, on special anniversaries.
Most of all we remember what it was like those years ago - the last few days, the events that unfolded that day, the final moments, the final goodbye, the final breath.
And when the anniversary of that particular day falls upon us it hurts - one year and two years and even three years later.
We will always remember.
Perhaps because we live without him every day.