The last few days and shiva details

First, the details - service Monday and Tuesday nights will be at our home at 12224 Gorham Ave at 630 tonight.  We kindly ask that everyone leave by 8p so that my children may get to bed at a reasonable hour. We are welcoming people at 430.

I cant begin to tell you how amazing yesterday was for me, my children and my family.  The numbers at the funeral were overwhelming.  We were so honored to see all the special people that showed up for Eddie.  It was so comforting and so unsurprising to us because Eddie was so loved.  When he got sick back in February he told our Rabbi when asked whether he was thinking about dieing "i am thinking about the funeral.  I just wish I could be there because it is going to be a great funeral".  It certainly was as great a day as one could hope for in such a circumstance.  I felt his calm and strength flowing through my veins like never before.

Along those lines, the night before I sat in the quiet of my bedroom writing the eulogy.  Our house at night is always very very quiet.  I then began reading the eulogy aloud and heard a noise.  I stopped and listened.  Quiet.  I started again and heard a noise.  I stopped.  I then heard the strangest bird chirp, unlike one I had ever heard before even in the daytime, let alone the night.  Our house is always so so so quiet at night.  I said "hello?" and it gave me one quick chirp.  I said "eddie?" and it gave another quick one chirp.  I said "i love you sweetie.  I am ok but I miss you.  Are you ok?" and it gave one more quick chirp.  I continued to read and it got quiet and that was it.  I did not hear it the rest of the night or last night.  I know in my heart it was Eddie and I am so happy to know he is ok.

I know the next few days will be exhausting but I want to do this right and feel the grief as much as I can.  I know in the coming year Dylan, Matthew and I will need you all more than ever and the best is knowing that you will all be there.

Please pass along for anyone who has a story or a comment about Eddie, to please email me at lorinabc@gmail.com.  I will be making a book and it will mean so much to my kids.

Thank you for everything.  We are blessed, even in the face of darkness.